So many business owners are following the rules, posting and creating content regularly… and getting little to no engagement and little to no sales.

They assume they just need the right way to game the algorithms, a fancier website, a different productivity hack, a better guru’s marketing strategy. They try and try… And get discouraged. And wonder if it’s them. Or if marketing just sucks. Or if the gods are against them.

Valiantly, they keep trying, and no matter what they do- it still doesn’t work.

And then they come and see me. And a few minutes into our conversation, they tell me they’ve been thinking something like:

• “I should have more followers. What’s wrong with me that more people aren’t following me? Why don’t people like me?”

• “I post and post and I get hardly any engagement. The algorithm just doesn’t show me to people. Or people just don’t care about what I have to share.”

• “I haven’t made as many sales as I should. Do they not like my product? Do they not like me? What am I doing wrong?”

• “If I explicitly make offers on my social media, people will think I’m too pushy and salesy and I’ll lose connections and people will be mean to me.”

• “I’m terrified of what will happen if I don’t make any money.”

• “I really really want my business to work, but what if it doesn’t? What if I risked everything for this business and it won’t work out? I don’t think I can handle failure.”

When these telltale statements pop up, I can tell immediately that it’s not that they don’t have the right strategy, the right tactics, a fancy enough website, the right Instagram aesthetics. The reason their marketing isn’t irresistibly attracting aligned clients to them in droves… is because of their emotional state when they’re trying to market.

The Emotions That Do & Don’t Lead to Irresistible Marketing

It’s nearly impossible to create irresistible marketing from an anxious, frightened, insecure, or doubtful headspace. 

Your creativity doesn’t flow- so anything you create you have to force yourself into. Forcing yourself to do stuff doesn’t exactly cheer you up, so the marketing you force yourself to create carries an air of desperation or defensiveness. The messaging is asking for something you lack rather than offering something from your overflow. You treat buying from you as an inconvenience, a favor, or even charity rather than an empowered exchange of valuable goods.

And if you keep having to force yourself to market- burnout will be a constant uninvited guest.

Marketing that comes from this place telegraphs discomfort and disconnection, and is unlikely to get you the results you want.

On the other hand, irresistible marketing comes from a place of exuberant invitation. Bubbling over with love for the offer that you know is going bring hope to whoever encounters it and heal, exhilerate, and dazzle whoever is wise enough to buy it.

Irresistible marketing is juicy, because it comes from a place of abundance. 

To aligned customers, encountering irresistible marketing is like an invitation to the best party of the year- one they’d be super bummed to miss out on. It’s like getting asked out by their crush, it’s like getting accepted to their dream school, it’s like being told by a trusted authority not to worry- there is a cure. It’s like trying on a dress that makes them look incredible and instantly feel 10x hotter and more confident. Their dreams are within their reach. Their hurts can be healed. It’s not too late for them. Everything they thought was wrong with them actually isn’t. They are deserving, they are worthy. They can have what they’ve always wanted.

Irresistible marketing gives from a place of overflow, it doesn’t ask from a place of lack.

How Do You Emotionally Prepare to Create Irresistible Marketing?

It would be nice if we could just flip a switch in our brains and instantly shed fear and shame and step into the joyful abundance that allows us to create irresistible marketing.

But, obviously, it’s not that simple.

A lot of our fears and anxieties come from deep wounds that imprinted us early in our histories. Healing them requires changing our habitual thoughts- the ways we are used to thinking about ourselves and the world. (Truly, opening a business necessitates a lot of shadow work.)

Stepping into abundance requires giving ourselves new thoughts to think over and over again until we believe them: thoughts that fill us with confidence, security, inner safety & trust. And if we’re not used to thinking about ourselves and the world like this, we need this hopeful messaging reinforced for us over and over again until we know how to tell it to ourselves in a way that we can listen.

You can get that hopeful messaging from podcasts, from books, from teachers- but it’s soooo much harder if the only person who really knows you and is affirming you, the only person encouraging you, the only person telling you that the risk of entrepreneurship was worth it, that even though it hasn’t paid off yet it will, that your success is inevitable- it’s so much harder if the only person saying that to you is, well, you.

You Need Cheerleaders

When you get the wobbles and stuck in a doubt spiral, do you have someone who can consistently remind you that you can do this? That you’re worthy & loveable and your contributions are needed and valid?

When you’re feeling discouraged, do you have someone who can remind you of the successes you’ve already had and point out the progress that you may not have noticed?

Do you have someone who will let you cry and feel afraid without trying to “fix it” by telling you to just take the safe path and follow the rules that never worked for you?

Do you have someone to give you permission to do it your way? And to remind you that you don’t need permission to do you anyway?

Do you have someone who will amp you up about being your full, authentic self in your business and will never advise you to hide “controversial” parts of your identity in the name of professionalism?

I certainly hope you have that person, or- preferably- several of them, because taking on the vastness of uncertainty that entrepreneurship confronts you with is so much more bearable when you have a cheerleader or two that you can count on to be in your corner.

Don’t Expect Cheerleading From Someone Who Didn’t Consent To Being a Cheerleader

You deserve cheerleading, but not from just anyone. Not even the people closest to you. 

Why? Because not everyone knows how to be a cheerleader. Not everyone wants to be a cheerleader. Not everyone has the spoons to be emotionally available in that way. Some may be triggered by the boldness of you going after what you want when they never dared to do that themselves. Some may be triggered by you breaking rules they never realized they themselves weren’t shackled to. Some may be afraid for you because life didn’t lead them to trust that sometimes financial or professional risks are worth it. Some may have a lot going on in their own lives and are not able to give you emotional labor without draining themselves.

Be wise about who you turn to for emotional support through your entrepreneurship journey. Because a whole lot of people aren’t going to get it. And a whole lot of people won’t have the capacity to help you shoulder the strong emotions that will inevitably be stirred up.

That does NOT mean you should try to go it alone. It does mean it is essential to your business that you source emotional support from capable, consenting, and skilled cheerleaders. A coach, a therapist, or me- the literal Marketing Confidence Cheerleader - we EXIST to support you through this. We’d be happy- not burdened- to help.

Signs You Need More Emotional Support STAT!

It’s unfortunate that so many folks floundering in their marketing consider therapists, coaches, or even The Marketing Confidence Cheerleader luxuries rather than necessities- since, as we’ve already covered, the thing that is preventing them from creating irresistible marketing is the stories they are telling themselves and the emotions that are being triggered by these stories.

Here are some clear indications that you need more emotional support in order to get your business to where you want it to go:

• You can’t stop comparing your social media following & revenue to other businesses and it keeps making you feel like 💩 

• You’re freaking out about your pricing: you keep lowering prices, offering discounts, and you break out in a cold sweat when you think about someone questioning you about why your offer is worth the price tag

• You can’t confidently explain the value your offer brings to customers

• You’re worried you’re not pretty enough/smart enough/loveable enough/professional enough for this to work

• You don’t think you have anything helpful to say in your marketing

• You think your marketing should have worked by now but it hasn’t- and that means something bad about you

• When you think about marketing, you feel crushing feelings of doubt, imposter syndrome, overwhelm, discouragement, or despair

If any of the above sound like you, your mean inner critic has taken over the wheel and is driving your brain. It thinks it’s keeping you safe and out of trouble, but it’s actually preventing you from growing your business and getting what you want.

Consistent, capable, and compassionate emotional support will give you the strength to take the wheel back and make the ride less hellish and more pleasure cruise- making it much more likely that you’ll reach your desired destination.

If you need that, I’d love to be your Marketing Confidence Cheerleader. Join my Season of Support 1:1 Cheerleading program today.

You’re invited to get some free cheerleading at my upcoming webinar: Why Nothing You've Tried For Marketing Has Worked & What To Do Instead on Nov. 15, 2022. Register at the link!